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Everybody must get stoned
Monday, February 18, 2008
The Lizard applauds the courage of Archbishop Rowan Williams in pointing out the
fundamental danger of expecting one law to cover all of us. For too long, we and
our fellow Lizards have found our personal code running up against the cruel and
petty restrictions of people who do not understand our culture.
Here then, copied directly from the ancient beermat on which they are inscribed, are
the fundamental tenets of Lizard Law, which all those entering our offices must
henceforward obey.
Breaking the Lizard Law is punishable by A S H Smyth, who’s into that kind of thing.
- Marc Sidwell
© lizardmagazine.com, 2008
Also see: Ave Sharia! (But if only the Archbonehead had gone further...)
Back to the homepage
Monday, February 18, 2008
The Lizard applauds the courage of Archbishop Rowan Williams in pointing out the
fundamental danger of expecting one law to cover all of us. For too long, we and
our fellow Lizards have found our personal code running up against the cruel and
petty restrictions of people who do not understand our culture.
Here then, copied directly from the ancient beermat on which they are inscribed, are
the fundamental tenets of Lizard Law, which all those entering our offices must
henceforward obey.
- Visitors must bring us drinks.
- No intern may wear a skirt longer than the established length laid down in
the Lizard Lawbook. - The correct form of greeting is, “I brought beer”.
- Lizardic Finance: It is against our way of life to pay tax.
- Anyone caught stealing our material will have their broadband cut off.
- Baconsalt must be tested on all foods.
- Adulterers can get stoned (but must pay for their own joints).
- Better bring us some snacks as well as that beer.
- Don’t be cheap.
- It is indecent for an editor to be alone in the office hot tub; interns should
always be prepared to act as an escort.
Breaking the Lizard Law is punishable by A S H Smyth, who’s into that kind of thing.
- Marc Sidwell
© lizardmagazine.com, 2008
Also see: Ave Sharia! (But if only the Archbonehead had gone further...)
Back to the homepage
