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The Lizard senses a conspiracy.
In the last few weeks, no major political party
has hailed the discovery that Copenhagen’s
bare-breasted Little Mermaid has a sister on
the red planet. ('Is Martian figure actually a
Danish mermaid?' Daily Telegraph)
As expert analysts such as “Madurobob” have
pointed out, this magnificent pair of
monuments are proof of "an ancient civilisation
that later departed Mars and settled
Denmark". The consequences for our space
program are hard to imagine. Yet David
Cameron and Gordon Brown refuse to answer
our telephone calls, even at night.
In the last few weeks, no major political party
has hailed the discovery that Copenhagen’s
bare-breasted Little Mermaid has a sister on
the red planet. ('Is Martian figure actually a
Danish mermaid?' Daily Telegraph)
As expert analysts such as “Madurobob” have
pointed out, this magnificent pair of
monuments are proof of "an ancient civilisation
that later departed Mars and settled
Denmark". The consequences for our space
program are hard to imagine. Yet David
Cameron and Gordon Brown refuse to answer
our telephone calls, even at night.
The Lizard, and its political wing, the Dangerous
Party for Adults, has decided it is time to break
through the wall of silence ourselves. We call
for a new Manhattan Project, provisionally
codenamed “Nordic Uplift” to investigate the
possibility that breasts – and even saunas -
may be more common in the universe than was
previously thought possible.
The behaviour of breasts on a low-gravity
planet deserve to be studied with the full
resources of our civilisation. Lobby your MP to
support Nordic Uplift today.
Party for Adults, has decided it is time to break
through the wall of silence ourselves. We call
for a new Manhattan Project, provisionally
codenamed “Nordic Uplift” to investigate the
possibility that breasts – and even saunas -
may be more common in the universe than was
previously thought possible.
The behaviour of breasts on a low-gravity
planet deserve to be studied with the full
resources of our civilisation. Lobby your MP to
support Nordic Uplift today.
| © lizardmagazine.com, 2008 |
| Are there breasts on Mars? Wednesday, January 30, 2008 |
Marc Sidwell