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Asia on my Mind
with Hiran Balasuriya
Superman's nipples, fluorescent pigs
and mistaken convictions
Friday, January 18, 2008
Please, Anything but the Nipples
Malaysian pop star Faizal Tahir has been forced to apologise for tearing
his shirt off in a televised concert, revealing a Superman logo painted on
his chest. Sharia law has limited jurisdiction in the country, but the
government nevertheless has stringent rules and guidelines for all
performers.
Officials of the television channel involved expressed their shock and
dismay at the stunt. Tahir has since apologised for failing to fully
understand how a pair of nipples and a suggestive 'S' on his bare chest
could be seen as far too hot for Malaysian television. He now realises
that "taking off one's shirt is a big no."
Other banned on-stage acts that may have suggestive themes include
hugging and jumping.
Can't Blame a Guy for Trying
Chinese Millionaire Wu Tianxi has been sentenced to death after a
gruesome virgin-rape extravaganza. It was revealed that Mr. Wu, 61,
had raped over 20 young girls, on the advice of a woman who told him
that he could extend his life if he only had enough sexual intercourse
with virgins.
Owing to his previous political status and links, the case was one of high
pressure. Wu currently denies the charges, claiming that he only
engaged in hiring the services of prostitutes. A woman arrested
alongside him, who had helped him track down the girls to gorge on, has
been sentenced to 20 years.
An ex-lawmaker and a boss of a food company, Wu always aimed high in
life. During the trial, it emerged that he had actually planned to rape 100
virgins.
Just What the World Needs
The Scientific Community of China continues its endless journey to
uncover the secrets of life with its latest magnificent design - glowing
pigs. They altered the genes of a cloned pig to make it glow fluorescent
green, and it has successfully passed off this feature to its young.
Liu Zhonghua, an academic in charge of the research program, said that
this proves transgenic pigs are fertile, and that they can definitely pass
on such altered traits or features to their offspring.
Entertaining though a glowing porker might be, science isn't all fun and
games. These little bundles of green flesh could be the first step in on
the road to pigs being specially engineered to produce organs for
transplant. Taken to its logical conclusion, humans might finally become
exactly what they eat.
Whoopsie
D.P. James was released from prison in Sri Lanka after serving a 50 year
sentence... for nothing.
James was 30 when he was charged with stabbing his father. After
being incarcerated in 1957, he was moved to a psychiatric hospital,
before being returned to prison in the eighties. The characteristic
apathy of the 1980s, it seems, did nothing to help his situation.
His lawyer claims that James is a villager, ignorant of the law and its
arcane ways; hence, he never appealed. A recent police check of the
80-year-old's hospital records revealed that there had in fact been no
proper conviction.
The courts came up with a novel way of compensating Mr James for his
lost five decades: they released him (on bail), and apologised for the
inconvenience. Fair dos: we all make mistakes, don't we?
© lizardmagazine.com, 2008
with Hiran Balasuriya
Superman's nipples, fluorescent pigs
and mistaken convictions
Friday, January 18, 2008
Please, Anything but the Nipples
Malaysian pop star Faizal Tahir has been forced to apologise for tearing
his shirt off in a televised concert, revealing a Superman logo painted on
his chest. Sharia law has limited jurisdiction in the country, but the
government nevertheless has stringent rules and guidelines for all
performers.
Officials of the television channel involved expressed their shock and
dismay at the stunt. Tahir has since apologised for failing to fully
understand how a pair of nipples and a suggestive 'S' on his bare chest
could be seen as far too hot for Malaysian television. He now realises
that "taking off one's shirt is a big no."
Other banned on-stage acts that may have suggestive themes include
hugging and jumping.
Can't Blame a Guy for Trying
Chinese Millionaire Wu Tianxi has been sentenced to death after a
gruesome virgin-rape extravaganza. It was revealed that Mr. Wu, 61,
had raped over 20 young girls, on the advice of a woman who told him
that he could extend his life if he only had enough sexual intercourse
with virgins.
Owing to his previous political status and links, the case was one of high
pressure. Wu currently denies the charges, claiming that he only
engaged in hiring the services of prostitutes. A woman arrested
alongside him, who had helped him track down the girls to gorge on, has
been sentenced to 20 years.
An ex-lawmaker and a boss of a food company, Wu always aimed high in
life. During the trial, it emerged that he had actually planned to rape 100
virgins.
Just What the World Needs
The Scientific Community of China continues its endless journey to
uncover the secrets of life with its latest magnificent design - glowing
pigs. They altered the genes of a cloned pig to make it glow fluorescent
green, and it has successfully passed off this feature to its young.
Liu Zhonghua, an academic in charge of the research program, said that
this proves transgenic pigs are fertile, and that they can definitely pass
on such altered traits or features to their offspring.
Entertaining though a glowing porker might be, science isn't all fun and
games. These little bundles of green flesh could be the first step in on
the road to pigs being specially engineered to produce organs for
transplant. Taken to its logical conclusion, humans might finally become
exactly what they eat.
Whoopsie
D.P. James was released from prison in Sri Lanka after serving a 50 year
sentence... for nothing.
James was 30 when he was charged with stabbing his father. After
being incarcerated in 1957, he was moved to a psychiatric hospital,
before being returned to prison in the eighties. The characteristic
apathy of the 1980s, it seems, did nothing to help his situation.
His lawyer claims that James is a villager, ignorant of the law and its
arcane ways; hence, he never appealed. A recent police check of the
80-year-old's hospital records revealed that there had in fact been no
proper conviction.
The courts came up with a novel way of compensating Mr James for his
lost five decades: they released him (on bail), and apologised for the
inconvenience. Fair dos: we all make mistakes, don't we?
© lizardmagazine.com, 2008
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